My friends think my boyfriend is not good enough for me. So take care of YOURSELF AND LOVE YOURSELF.

My friends think my boyfriend is not good enough for me I believe for a healthy relationship an open communication is very important. I do my best but it seems it's never enough. Me (19f) recently got into a relationship (a week ago) with my bf (18m), and while some people have been somewhat supportive, some of my more outspoken friends have been very honest about what they think of me dating my boyfriend. TLDR: My long distance boyfriend wants me to spend the 100% of my free time with me on videocall, and I can't be happy living like that. There are some parents who sadly believe that no one is good enough for their darling daughter or son, no I'm a girl with a small butt myself and I like to joke a lot about it, because I naturally love auto depreciative humor, since it makes me feel good. He’s been unsure about me for a long time. He is very handsome and women are drawn to him. So that kinda confirms even more what kind of person he is. My (18F) boyfriend (21M) has never bought me flowers. Ur topic reminded me of my last relationship, my ex bf worked and had his life on track while I was still studying and struggling to figure out life. To start off, me and my boyfriend broke up a few months ago because things got overwhelming, and I talked to guys very shortly after we broke up and sent pictures to somebody he really hated. I grew up with a lot of shitty peers lmao, the people in my life right now are super healthy for me, and my family has always been great. My boyfriend (lets call him Miles), treats me like a queen. Self defence lessons wouldn’t go amiss either. I’m not some model, but I’m a good guy who loves my wife, I try to treat her like the most important person on the planet, I think I’m smart and creative and have a lot of life experience that I try to use to help others. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. If a friend of mine had a problem with my guy, she’s gonna bring it to me, not slink around and treat him like shit. I recommend you seriously reconsider the dynamic here. Still it's worrisome that the people I care about don't like him. Along with that, he doesn't listen to any issues that I have with the way he is acting. I had to give him that chance. It's that I would mindfully make sure not to make him think for even a minute that he's not attractive to me because I am aware that he has relatively low self-esteem and doesn't think that he is attractive. He's told me that he doesn't feel good enough for me. (Not super great, but also I don’t want to make commitments to someone who isn’t right or quickly) Except I have one friend who doesn’t like him. Edit: They've seen me with a black eye twice and once with a cut on my eyebrow. People aren’t attracted to models - they’re attracted to self-confidence and being comfortable in your own skin. But I’m good looking. She even said she'd stopped hanging out with him herself, because she thought he seemed fake and cold after a while. Very disempowering, and very untrue. I don’t think I’m good enough for my boyfriend because I don’t like myself and he shouldn’t have to put up with my issues Believe it or not, you're being selfish, not selfless. tl;dr: My friends think that my shy and quiet boyfriend is abusive, and don't believe me when I say that he isn't. I am obsessed with my partner’s faults. The constant ding of notifications replaces meaningful eye contact, and you can't help but think, “My boyfriend is always on his phone, and I'm feeling second best. upvotes · comments r/relationship_advice When someone tells you they don’t think you’re good enough, it’s indicative they think they’re better than you and are somehow special and you aren’t. 9 Possible Reasons Why Your Friends Dislike Your Partner 1. That he loves all the other qualities about me that make me a good person and girlfriend (kindness, smarts, humour, loving nature). Did you expect your boyfriend to just be like “yeah, me, u, and my best friend (his). Yeah I read your post and comments. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: When C told me she could not believe that a guy would choose me over her, I immediately got upset and went off on her instead of taking a calmer approach. The friendship between the friend and BF sounds pretty innocent to me. Despite this, he has been pressuring me to find a job (and I AM actively searching for a job/have been submitting applications), and he has implied that I am not doing enough because I’m not getting out and asking for jobs in person. Your boyfriend might come to you and tell you in his vulnerable moment that he feels like he is not enough for you - or he might not. It came to a head when my bf and I got into an argument and he started screaming at me, "all my friends think you're weird! They ask me why I'm even with you because you're so fucking weird!" I was not. This same thing happened to me and my ex who was twice my age. One of my ex had an super thick dick and the other had a really big (long) dick while my current boyfriend is just average. However, he is insanely sensitive and would take everything I say the wrong way. me and my boyfriend have been dating 4 years almost. I felt that that what was best for me, and I didn't really date anyone seriously for about 3 years, which leads me to my current boyfriend. My boyfriend is generally nice to me, supportive of my goals, faithful, ect, but he thinks he is way better than me. This will make you feel complex. Much of that has to do with "Nothing I do is right, or it's not good enough. EDIT 2: 5) My boyfriend and I have an amazing relationship. If your friends and family can’t tell you what they truly think, That just further reinforces my point. And when I talk with other men who are friends or acquaintances, they seem to think that I am quite attractive/beautiful as well. That said, I do not think he is the right partner for you. The amount of time you spend with your TD,LR; my boyfriend doenst trust me because he has been cheated on and it is causing him to have bad traits such as going through my phone and getting mad that I have guy friends. First your an asian female, your already one of the most wanted females out there in terms of race. i was always there for him, i helped him grow as a person. But having a partner straight up tell me I'm not enough for him because of my body type then I think it's But i doubted myself because he SAYS he’s in love with my personality and thought maybe I’m a hypocrite or the shallow If it’s not good enough that he loves my personality and not my looks. I’m in love with him after all. I've made other friends in the past year, but no one I feel the same connection to as my friend. I sound crazy shallow, but I don’t believe I am. I've had great success at this. Sometimes, these feelings of inadequacy are the result of an experience in previous relationships. And, it is all because a Hijackal needs and feeds on control, power, and status. His major is extremely demanding, mine not so much. My girlfriend feels lost, she hates her job, feels like she can't get another job. I feel like I always have to beg to go and hang out with him. So I asked him recently how he could like the girls who are opposite of me. Being the perfect boyfriend requires far more work than just being yourself. I would not tolerate one of my partner’s friends treating me like this, so either you step up and tell her to knock it off, or Matt will most likely decide how much more harassment he can take. I think both compromise to 3 weekends is okay, and also you don't need to spend the whole weekend together? “I’m not good for you” – the age-old, romanticized dialogue that angst-ridden heroes used on their romantic interests. He said he wanted to be the only guy I rely on My boyfriend and I have been talking for 5 months and exclusive for two. V ate more than 15 slices alone (I didn't count but I know it was close). On the other hand, if he's not good enough for him (which I said, might very well be true), he should just set me free and start looking for someone better. " That's probably not the case, it's more something like: "My boyfriend saw his friends' true colours when they talk shit about me. He has a decent job, strong network of friends, and seemed to have his shit pretty much together. My boyfriend’s friends mean the world to him but I don’t want to subject myself to flat out abuse anymore. He barely kisses me now and literally the only sexual thing he does is try and grab my boobs when I'm getting dressed. he told me im too shy and it makes Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help! Members Online • luckyandlost. He goes to a very very good school whereas mine is good, but not nearly as great. I tend to be extremely critical when considering if someone could be my boyfriend. Do not give him instructions. I fantasize about fucking other people or being ravaged. For some reason he doesn't feel comfortable talking to you about his concerns and is, instead, airing them to his best friend. The answer is friendship. I’m starting to think that my friends treats me better than my boyfriend. I see some people in the comments suggest your boyfriend's friends, personally I think it is good to also have friends independent from your boyfriend. Friends since HS. Lately he’s been withdrawn and doesn’t give me nearly any attention. You think he's a great dresser with a sensitive heart. If this is the healthiest relationship you have ever had then your bar is too low. She is not good at making new friends. Perhaps you let your guard down in the past and allowed yourself to believe you were trust your boyfriend when he says he wants to be with you, and don't worry about the rest of it. Sometimes I feel my partner is not good enough for me. I wanted to protect myself and prevent feelings for people at all costs. He's controlling, he's manipulative, and just because he says he's "doing it for your own good" doesn't mean that's true. I think in the course of our entire relationship we've had 5 fights. It’s not true and don’t believe it. This is not a healthy relationship and his comments are manipulative and abusive. You don’t need anyone better, anyone perfect, just him. Stop and no will always mean no. He went on to say that he still loves me more than life, and that he is attracted to certain parts of me (my eyes, smile, hair, large breasts & booty). He barely talks to anyone about his feelings, with the exception of two friends. He ticks most of the boxes except he’s not handsome enough. As soon as I sat back down, a waiter came over with a big pile of leaves for me. I’m realizing lately though that i don’t feel he is in love with that either (at least not nearly to the capacity i love people or depth I need to feel loved), he often looks away or doesn’t Regaining confidence to feel good enough. I have been with others where the sex was incredible so it’s hard to know that is out there but not inside my partner. My gf and I (both F 20), have been on and off for two years. If you love him his dick size shouldn't matter. He's not a good boyfriend. I’ve been told that before for one reason or another, and what you discover is, you’re more than enough and you don’t need their approval. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. I have no time for any “friend” of mine who would be shitty to my guy or make him feel unwelcome, it’s just fucking rude and manipulative. Not because he thinks your not attractive, but because you think you arent. It takes a toll on your well-being, and self-worth, making you stew in a pool of anxiety perpetually. (m,20) in 3 years relationship with my girlfriend (f,20) in some arguments, my girlfriend would say im not man enough for her. If we break up they will be friends again. this kind of self sabotage "I don't think I'm good enough" bullshit is pure poison. I happen to think that I’m quite pretty, by no means perfect. I had to text my guy friend and asked for help, my boyfriend found out and he got really upset about it. He's not being friendly, kind, or nice, from what you've written, pretty much everything passed the 'platonic' boundary a while ago and at this stage you either stop talking to him or do your boyfriend a favour and cut him loose to find someone who respects him enough to not let another guy live rent free in their head because of the 5% he falls short in. My family, and most of my friends, absolutely adore my boyfriend and thinks he is great and perfect for ME. Me: I saw you 3 days ago, you didn’t have free time then? I do not think you are overreacting and you should confront to him about this. Trigger warning for domestic abuse So my(F26) friend Kay( F26) has been dating Andrew( M25) for almost a Why does my boyfriend not feel good enough for me? If you think your boyfriend isn’t good enough for you, the best advice I can give you is to notice that that’s a red flag that you aren’t meant to be together. My boyfriend is very kind and gentle and sweet and loving and affectionate. He also doesn’t think I’m good enough for my boyfriend and thinks he has a place in choosing who my bf is with. You know, formally dressed. There are men out there who simply cannot vocalize such emotional sentences. I used to be the boyfriend in this scenario, this reminds me a lot of how I was with my ex. He’s not ugly, just average looking. When I’m often preoccupied with the question of whether my partner is good enough for me. His sexuality is questionable. You are not good enough. Whatever the case, don't let your friends get away with making fun of his flamboyancy followed by a sigh. Whereas I, on the other hand, am a tomboy with piercings. More of a kids at school/football coaches thing. So, how See more When we’re together we sleep together, but recently he became really emotional (like he was going to cry) and was telling me that “I deserve better than him” and that “he’s not good enough for me. He was first my best friend for a year before this and we went to school together. Friends and family don't think he I’ve been seeing this guy for 6 months and we decided to officially become a couple after about a month of dating. You might feel you are not good enough for your girlfriend because she is more comfortable sharing her feelings and emotions with her best friend than she is with you. My boyfriend (25M) implied that I (24F) am a whore for going out with my friends Losing a boyfriend sucks, but I'm more hurt that I was there for my friend, and she ditched me. I’m not making this post to brag, or to complain about my partner, but I genuinely need some advice. I can't find someone like He stood up and yelled fuck off at me over and over. Simply because he is one of a kind, and there will be no You say you interpret the “you’re not good enough for me” as you can get better for her. #10 She likes her best friend . I would show up with flowers, try to be spontaneous, I was attentive and loving, but I My current boyfriend's dick is small compared to both my exes' and I feel unfulfilled. Slow down will always mean slow down. Not too good for me, but he was fashionable, outgoing, honest, funny, intelligent, confident, and really went after his interests. 6) My boyfriend is not the kind to vent to his friends about me. I really do. When I finally told him it felt like he was asking me to go for all the wrong reasons, he stopped. He is mildly sexual. " Do you feel that way much of the time with your partner, your mother, or a boss? Not Before you talk to him, I think you need to have a conversation with yourself, by yourself about what you need/want/expect from a relationship, and also about self-respect. Always the air of “you are not good enough and if you just did xyz then he could love you. Everytime i compare i'll always end up feeling like im not as good as them, that my boyfriend deserves to be with someone that is better than me. This is a whole ball of no. He asked me for coffee after the term ended and I agreed (but made sure to bring up my boyfriend to make my relationship status clear). We have been through a lot and i love him very much. Think about how impressionable that is for him. I ran out of the lettuce leaves you use to make wraps, and went up to the self-serve condiment bar to get some more, but they weren't there. I also get that you can’t have it all. However, I think my boyfriend is better looking than me. I clarified with him that my safe word will always be stop. They think he's gay. Please be You seem to think "My boyfriend is no long friends with these people because he wants to take revenge on them for saying something about me. First, why are you bringing up the notion of having a threesome if you’re going to get offended. I (f24) think my husband (m30) is cheating on me/meeting up with somebody under the guise of getting me coffee. i My parents have the same dynamics between them and at times I have seen my father blatantly disrespecting my mother and being “oh you don’t know anything about this” without even hearing her because he feels she doesn’t know enough to contribute or her opinion is not valid because she doesn’t understand or do the grind. Your boyfriend's behviour is completely out of line. He isn’t the Obligatory sorry for the formatting on the phone, sorry if it's super crazily long and sorry English is not my first language. Second, you should leave your bf. It all came to a head last Saturday when she was going to meet most of my friends at a small party (we’re all vaccinated and low risk), and she was anxious about meeting them so she starting drinking pretty heavily right when she got off work (around 10 pm) and by the time me and my friend came to pick her up (around 11:30) she didn’t My group of friends (21F) decided to have an intervention telling me that I’m being abused because he “has a history”, and that I haven’t been hanging out with them or my family as much. When we’re together we sleep together, but TLDR; Due to a job she hates, limited income, etc she thinks she isn't good enough for me. Some boys are able to tell their girlfriends how they feel about their role in a relationship. That is u/Dragonflymeadow. We connected really well and spent most weekends hanging out together over the summer and talk a lot when we’re not together. ) but I really want this one to work out (I think he has very good qualities as a man better than anyone I’ve met before) but can’t help it is somewhat abusive or excessive. My boyfriend used to push, but not nearly to this extent. I was introverted and maybe a little awkward but that didn't and hasn't stopped me from making friends outside of that group. ” Don’t bring it up. tell your workplace/education pepper spray or even deodorant can hopefully blind him enough for you to get away. I read one of your comments about her, that’s not a friend. I think you should wait until you find someone kinder and more empathetic to have your first sexual intercourse experience with. People can be objectively handsome/beautiful/lovely and you can recognize that without it being a big thing. You're allowed to do things and live the life you want. I’d suggest some therapy if you think like that (it is a good way to end up being abused and staying He'll ask me for sexy pictures and I'll be very resistant to send them, and it upsets him because he insists that he think's i'm extremely good looking, but I just can't entirely believe it, and I'm not sure why. He compliments me at any chance he gets, give me gifts that I don't even . I love my boyfriend, but I’d love to be treated better. My ex was the same way, as I have a variety of issues and wasn’t the primary breadwinner. ADMIN MOD My boyfriend [28/m] thinks he's not good enough for me and I [24/agender] worry that I'm starting to believe him? Also, vaguely He knows he has to meet me where I am, and if he doesn't, he knows whose fault that is. I feel we lack a connection. I don't think it's a good idea to be with someone you feel the need to change to be Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. I like to put actual effort into my texts and be able to actually read and think about what my SO sent me, on some days my lunch is not the time to do that. We have lived together since January and have been together 2. Once I was at a Korean restaurant with my boyfriend. So take care of YOURSELF AND LOVE YOURSELF. (36M) think my wife (38F) is cheating on me and using me as a cover Maybe feeling not good enough triggered if your friend didn’t call when she said she would, or someone rejected your ideas or perhaps your relationship ended. I personally hate my boyfriend’s best friend. But I'm starting to wonder about us and I don't know what to think anymore. I feel exactly like OPs girlfriend I almost thought about breaking up with him tonight because I feel like I am not good enough for him or give him what he needs right now. You're 18, so it's a My best friend and sister don't think he's good enough for me but they don't see his gentlemanly romantic side. I don't know what advice I'm asking for here, I just feel wronged that my friend left me behind when I would never do the same to her. When a man thinks he is not good enough for you, there could be a myriad of reasons behind it. Perhaps, his intentions are genuine. My first girlfriend when I was like 15 also made me feel like I was unattractive when crying. Toss him back. Jesus christ girl, you are only 24. Your boyfriend is not 100% happy about this pregnancy and your relationship. I’ve talked to him about this in the past. Conflicts should not be avoided as unresolved conflicts put bricks behind the two of you in a relationship and once the brick wall gets tall enough, then the relationship would crumble. Not an "oh i dont think i could do better" one but a "he wont cheat on me because he knows im out of his league" thing. You don't think you're good enough for him so you're trying to unilaterally make the decision to break up to protect yourself from any future heartache when/if His friend is not his friend. Your not ready to date. No flowers. She’s nice to him, obviously, and nice to me when he is in the same room. He even told me to leave him for my parents and not hurt their feelings but I don't want to lose a boy like him who is willing to do everything for me. My girlfriend doesn’t think she’s good enough for me and it is ruining our relationship This is a throw away because my gf uses reddit a lot I’m gonna try and keep this short. Just because she’s more attractive than me, that doesn’t scare me. If he can’t give you what you need, then he’s just not worth it. All she wants is your company, and when that doesn’t happen, she feels she is not good enough for you. You will wonder what is lacking in your relationship. So what that his ex was conventionally attractive, they obviously weren’t right for each other because he’s with you now, and he loves you exactly as you are. They see you’re changing. Your time, vibe, and Honestly sometimes at work if I have been super busy, I just need some time to myself to zone out and not have to have a convo with anyone in any form. it never mattered that he never loved me as much as i loved him; i was truly in love with him. tl;dr: New boyfriend is a lot smarter than me, makes me feel inferior, not sure if it's going to work out. There will be doubts in your mind, but you gotta keep reminding yourself that he chose to be with you for a reason. He’s Extremely Critical of Himself. They are always about stupid little things and we resolve them quickly. 7 days in a row we've had hour long arguements past midnight. He takes me out, and brags about me to his friends. i’m an idiot and beg for him every time. My parents would insinuate this sort of thing when I was 16, 17. I have been where you are and worse. ” She said, with tears streaming down her cheek. So I feel relieved that I don't have to be the perfect boyfriend; I can just be me. i recently broke up with my boyfriend of two years. Friends say my BF is too ugly for me . Trigger Warning: abuse Mood Spoiler: hopeful ending Original Post: August 5, 2023. If you feel that the opinions of his friends are hindering your relationship in some way, you should let your boyfriend know what you are feeling and why! Explain that It's not that I'm not levelling with him. I think about it all Which means that you don't have to be thinking the way that you do. So, you’ve come to the conclusion, “My boyfriend’s friends don’t like me?” You probably are feeling a bit down, because, let’s face it - we all want to parents think Me and my boyfriend were friends prior to us dating, i really think that would be a good idea & don’t give him even a HINT of where you’ve moved to. What do YOU want? Go for that. Me and my girlfriend have been having a tonne of fights lately. We have been dating for over a year, I’ve asked and asked for him to buy me flowers. So, there it is. Whenever my friends say negative things about themselves I make them say 5 nice things about 3. Just walk away please don't go back to him at any cost. To me, it sounds like you’re just not ready for the level of relationship your boyfriend desires from you. com ‘ Need help to know your next best steps? Why? Because the main issue is that he doesn’t really give me enough attention. we went on a vacation with his family of about 15, of which i do not know, so i was shy and didn’t talk much and kind of followed him around for everything. Or worse, you stick with him, have children, and then he tells them they aren't good enough either 6. And there's the sex. we decided to order enough pizza so that one of us could eat about 4 slices. On days I don't want to work out with my boyfriend, that's where I can be found. If he does try to reach out to you it will be because HE IS LONELY and only cares about HIS wants and needs. But if you get married you get the man who stopped caring enough to write you a 2 second good morning or wear proper pants for a date. I’m just not very good with my words and I really want to talk to him about it but I just don’t know how to say it. But I’m bored. On paper I have a good boyfriend — he is sweet, helpful, willing to accommodate my needs, and always has my back. You have to love yourself, and the body your in before someone else can. I want him happy. I don't even know how to start this. com ‘ Need help to know your next best steps? Love isn’t always enough. It's okay to worry about it sometimes, most people have those feelings - but you need to accept that those feelings are bullshit, they're irrational, and if you know what's good for you you won't pay them any mind. Our sexual chemistry is great too and we argue really well, calmly resolve issues together. He does a good job, and really tries to make me feel pretty. My parents think that my boyfriend is not good enough for me but he loves me a lot. He told me a few months ago (3 days before our one year anniversary) that he feels bad for never buying me flowers, so I just said that we had an important date coming up, so it’s okay. What should I do? We're both 24, been together 5 years. My (27F) boyfriend (31M) and I have been together for a little under a year now and I just get the feeling he's not sexually attracted to me. I recently had a mental breakdown and its definitely seeming like I'm bipolar. Yet my boyfriend pushes me to have a relationship with her or at least keep the peace. If you have a #Hijackal in your life, or think you might have, get my free ebook, How To Spot A Hijackal, at Hijackals. I compare to his female friends, i compare to my female friends, i compare to my female cousins. I always felt guilty and not good enough bc I couldn’t give the things he gave to me. He has been described by She met them all through online gaming. You don't have a boyfriend, you have a friend with benefits - no romantic attachment, but lots of sex. It's so draining. When you get into a new relationship, things change. He compliments the type of person I am but then tells me he doesn't like the type of person I am, but he says he loves me. She’s kind of toxic and keeps making weird remarks to me, which my boyfriend had told her off for. It's irrational but it bothers me. We are very happy and have discussed engagement sometime in the next year. I send him nudes, porn links, try on outfits, do things I know he likes, but he never really does seem enthusiastic about me. I love listening to my boyfriend, but I will admit, quite often I do not get his references. This is gonna be a cluttered list, I'm sorry, I just need to get these frustrations out, I'm having an awful week. My best friend (30m) is asking me (32m) if I can get tested to donate my kidney to his sister (21f) and I don’t want to. I think I’m above average. i waited hand and foot for him no matter what. While in retrospect these dialogues sound extremely condescending You are not good enough. im sad, as i always try to be the best for her, but yes i do mistakes throughout the journey, but how can i change to become someone i am not? If you need to ask for attention that's not a good sign. I suppose I want people to say “Hey, he’s handsome,” but they may not think that with I am NOT the Original Poster. I think the reason a lot of the people she's close to don't like me is because I have extreme social anxiety and don't talk much which makes me come across as stuck up. I have been dating a girl for the last 7 months. THE DILEMMA OF your parents or your family not liking your partner can be a tricky one. My boyfriend is amazing and has been here for me through it all. Not because my friend is worried or jealous, just because 99% of the things I have to Do you know how rare it is to find a good friend when your close to I’m not a bad looking woman. I'm asian (Korean), she's an outrageously gorgeous latina (Brazilian), and even though I'm in love with her, this situation is weird to me. this has caused a majority of issues now that we’re back together, and now he doesn’t trust me because I was untruthful when we started talking again and because of the fact I called a My [27F] BF [26M] is not a curious person and rarely asks me questions about myself or my thoughts on things. My [27F] boyfriend [33M] thinks he is a loser and not good enough for me. Not healthy on his end, not fulfilling for either. At first we were very happy. I went on a date with a guy who I decided, within a few hours, was too cool for me. 2. My boyfriend’s ‘66M’ friend ‘65M’ comes over EVERY day from about 4 or 6pm till after 10 or midnight. I wish I had an answer for OP. My (F25) bf (M24) Tell him how you want to be with him and plan to be with him so get the stupid idea he’s not good enough out of his head and don’t let the haters ruin his ship with you I bet there are plenty I constantly feel like I'm not good enough for her and I feel like the people that she's close to don't like me which just increases this feeling. So here’s the problem As much as I love spending time with my gf, Friday night to Sunday/Monday morning every week is a bit much imo. . Before I met my boyfriend, I came out of a long term abusive relationship (over 10 years) where what I did and who I saw was controlled, and i feel like I've missed out on years of media and culture, and kind of lost my identity. he tells me i’m too shy and it makes him unhappy. told me (M28) she doesn’t think she will ever be able to love me as much as she loved My(F25) boyfriend(26) doesn't want me to lose weight and I think he is sabotaging my weight loss Throwaway account since boyfriend frequently uses Reddit. My friends live in a State that I moved from 4 years ago. I would find a new best friend. I've been in exactly your position where I wanted to have my own life and the guy I was with desperately wanted to insert himself into my new shiny university environment because he himself had nothing else to do. Being in this relationship is hurting Last night, my boyfriend stated that I was not beautiful, just adequately attractive. He was valedictorian in high school and I was number 5 in my class. Me (23M) and my girlfriend (28F) have been together for almost 2 years. There’s multiple comments to leave him but there’s always room for growth in any relationship. i helped him through his problems and listened to him when he needed to talk. He's always been smarter than me. I met this guy, I’ll call him Jake, in a university course last year. I appreciate the person my boyfriend is. I don't think am too good at it, also my penis isn't big. I can't help but think that I'm still not truly enough for her, she's a very energetic and passionate girl, I always try and match that same energy, but sometimes I'm just not up for it- but of course, i still try- it works, and she's happy ya know? but another part of her likes getting pictures taken for her and other cool stuff like camera work, editing, dancing, singing, drawing, painting However, I still have enough money saved up to afford to split bills with my BF every month. I unintentionally made my boyfriend feel he is not going to be good enough for me My boyfriend and I have been dating for more than a year now, and we're pretty serious about it. This would cause me to think, "If the perfect boyfriend can not satisfy a woman, why be the perfect boyfriend?" Then I realize, this is a good thing. I’m just human. My bf really does love me, he told me that he just can’t love himself enough to think he’s good enough for me. It is imperative to understand why you might be feeling Me (19f) recently got into a relationship (a week ago) with my bf (18m), and while some people have been somewhat supportive, some of my more outspoken friends have been very honest What to do when you think you’re not good enough? The first step in feeling good enough and finding your value is determining what’s causing your fear and insecurity or perhaps anxiousness. First time I got a black eye I fell getting out of the tub and the second time my cousin accidentally elbowed me in the eye and the cut on my eyebrow I got when I slipped and fell on some ice. My boyfriend(19) and I (19) are in a little bit of a disagreement because he doesn’t want me to go clubbing with my friends & I want to go. ” What does my boyfriend really mean You Are "Everything" To Your Partner. When he came over to friends/ my place he said he just thought we were ocd or “messaphobic” as he says. It’s not fair to either of you. Nah, she’s not right. She's not only gorgeous, she's also very intelligent, funny, and an easy going person. Do NOT let a guy make decisions for you. Also there are some "dating apps" to find friends (bumble bff for instance) Maybe sports/hobbies to meet people or local communities. We first met at work, became friends, and now she's my girlfriend. I think the friend is young I text a group chat with all 3 of us, I don’t really text him directly much at all. Recently, my boyfriend and I got into a sort of argument because he told me that it was ‘taxing’ to have to respond to me over text and that he only did it to make me happy. Some things I think you need to clarify with yourself and with him is that it is perfectly normal to find other people attractive outside the confines of your relationship. Hindsight is 20/20. (Not that long, I know. They should be able to tell you the truth. You’ve been let down in love before. “You are enough. It's like everyday he has something to complain about. If your partner is constantly seeking validation, it may be a sign that he doesn’t feel confident in himself and needs external validation to feel good. My friends think I’m totally out of my boyfriend’s league and he never stood a chance with me. He also has lots of friends (he's not popular but he has plenty of nerdy friends) whereas I'm more of a loner. Tell her you deserve someone who sees you as a team, who trusts you, who doesn’t expect you to be the carer/provider but you expect both of you to do that. ” No matter how not good he is like he thinks, all you care about is having him is enough. It's like a 12 year old that's just seen boobs for the first time. He was drunk and always claimed to not hear me when I said stop, and took the "daddy" thing and rape fantasy too hard. When you're feeling unappreciated or you feel that someone else thinks you aren't good enough, whether it be as a parent, spouse, friend, or child, your self-confidence can You know, formally dressed. He may believe you deserve a better partner than Feeling not good enough for him or her is emotionally exhausting, to say the least. I wasted close to 10 years with him, not to mention every penny I had scraped together while he was more than abundantly bankrolledtowards the end I was throwing up every day, shaking, sweating, couldn’t breathe and was spending 6 hours locked away in the bathtub every day If he considers that I'm good enough for him, he should accept me with both my flaws and my qualities and stop making me feel like I'm failing on every single day. It's not just one issue, it's lots of small things. I’m not sure why I felt that way because I had a great job, good friends, did my bit in life to “My boyfriend makes me feel like I’m not good enough and keeps pointing out my flaws. You're just projecting your annoyance on us there :) He got really upset when I said this, claiming that as my boyfriend, he shouldn't have to schedule in advance like he's making a doctor's appointment or something. That I likely could be beautiful if I lost weight. An example: We went to a friends meeting (It was his first time meeting my friends). My best friend (30m) is asking me (32m) if I can get tested to donate my He's a good enough guy but not right for you. We have been working on our relationship since the beginning, but she’s always telling me that im not being affectionate enough or showing her that I love her. My boyfriend saw how my face lit up as I said "Thank you!" So does mine, and I love it. You could also consider "prettying" yourself up if you are this bothered by it. Is this a red flag? Tldr; at home my boyfriend is sweet but socially doesn't express himself well. However, I have been feeling for a long time like something is "off" and only recently figured out what it was. You do not just accept every flaw just because you love someone. Oh no, my parents never made me feel this way. Being someone's "everything" may Do you feel like your boyfriend or girlfriend is too good for you? Like you are somehow not enough for him/her? Here's how to feel enough. My friend gave me two books, My ex (F32) says this is a good thing? I think my insecurities stemmed from me feeling like I wasn’t good enough because my partner’s family were extremely wealthy whereas mine were middle class. ” If this sounds all too familiar, you're not alone. She posted in r/TwoHotTakes. When he leaves, we don’t speak. unfortunately for me, he never did the same for me. She doesn't Accept that 1) you may not be as fugly as you think you are, 2) your boyfriend may find you attractive either way, and 3) most people get fuglier as they age and your boyfriend may just not consider your physical appearance as tantamount as you do. I don’t want to bring him around them anymore because I feel like my relationship and everything we do is going to be viewed on a microscopic level. But at 24 I LIVED with my boyfriend, in another state 90 minutes away, was attending grad school and had a job, and saw my family at most once every other month or so. 5 years. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years now and since we met, both of us have been on the heavier side. He's just not. My boyfriend absolutely disgusts me with the way he lives. Archived post. I've tried reassuring him so many times that he is but he just won't accept it. I am a very sexual person. You may feel you are not enough. He doesn't like my body and sometimes tells me I'm unattractive but then tells me I'm beautiful other times. Tl;dr- I feel like my boyfriend chooses his friends over me and I’m not sure how I should feel. tdlr; My (F23) best friend (M24) treats me better than my (M24) boyfriend She told me that she regrets not telling me earlier, but that my bf actually cheated on the girl he was with before me with "Mary". I think I'm not enough for her and I believe that eventually she will get to the same conclusion. Love doesn’t conquer all. Just talk with your bf as best as you can. Mary’s relationship was toxic from I (17F) feel like my boyfriend (17M) doesn’t give me enough attention, but I also just want to check if I’m being needy. And if he doesn't put in the effort, losing him is not some massively huge hole in my life, because he is a perc, not my whole world. Tell her that she’s not good enough for you either, and that she can change for the better too. Fair enough, but do you understand when in your main post you say “I don’t want him there because I want it to be just me and my friends” summed up; not those exact wordsit sounded like you were outright rejecting him? This relationship doesn’t sound healthy or fulfilling. Which obviously is not true and also a bad habit because someon is bkund to be better at something. Example: Me: Can I see you today? Him: I’m tired Me: Ok we can nap together Him: No but I’m just tired, I just want free time. He always eats whatever he wants and doesn't do the mental math so that there's food for everyone. EDIT: After contemplating, I realized that it's unlikely he's dating me for my looks, as we met online and talked for about a month before going on our first date. Men take us for granted, and are lazy about relationships. Guys think I’m hot. That could be because he thinks his friends would think less of him for being with you, it could be because he thinks you aren't cool enough (but he seems a little old for that sort of drama), or it could be he has lied to his friends in some way about you and doesn't want to risk being exposed by having them interact with you at length. So my boyfriend and I live together and we have been together for 5 years. Not sure if you're working yet, but a 2-day weekend is never enough for partner, family, friends and chores. I saw some of them last year, which was the first time in three years I saw them, that was September last year. EDIT: it’s alarming how early people give up on relationships. I'm a psych major, don't really earn well, not that funny, good looking but like 8/10, smart but not enough that it would make me stand out. She had no business talking to you that way. If he hasn't spoken to you in a week that's not a good sign. I think right now you’re blindsided to Cassie and your history with her, but she isn’t a friend. When my For me, if I'm used to speaking in a straightforward and professional way all day, and if I'm used to openly expressing and discussing my views with others who might disagree, then I don't see the need to use an overly gentle, hyper-feminine, baby-talk voice just to have those same conversations with my partner, nor am I going to treat my I also like to see my friends on occasion and even to gasp take some time for myself to reddit, paint, write, etc. ” That is not right. zpjebc bgka ppvw aknyv poorsy rkmzz ardedj klkjts lzv pnlxt